The upcoming weekend is the 4th of 4 in a row that I am traveling out of town. At least this weekend's trip is a lengthy drive, but not flights, as the others have been. Which means we can be a bit more casual about exact departure time and about stuffing things in the car rather than packing them so neatly in suitcases.
Three weekends and one more to come away from home has meant, rather obviously, that I've had less time for domestic chores- dishes, laundry, cleaning, cooking. I enjoy these duties most of the time, and enjoy having a tidy and clean home. But with just small bits of time at home on weekday evenings, I've been falling behind.
Last evening, I was feeling overburdened. I cancelled an evening engagement, and thought I'd catch up on a few of these things, and get some more Christmas decorating done. This didn't feel good. Even thinking about it made me feel tired and stressed- those same Poor Me feelings that in the past would lead directly to a bottle of wine.
Instead, I made a different decision. I made some comfort food, and spent the entire evening re-reading an old favorite novel. And then I went to bed early.
This morning: the dishes hadn't miraculously cleaned themselves. The load of wet wash was still in the washer, and the floor remained un-vacuumed. And it was OK. There was no lightning bolt from the heavens, condemning me as a slob or inadequate person.
The house may still be a bit of a mess when we set out tomorrow afternoon- meaning we would come home to a less-than-tidy home Sunday evening.
And that is OK too. I soothed myself last night. I took care of myself the way I would care for one of my kids if they were overwhelmed. And I feel FINE today!!